WAS/WERE
A downloadable angst for Windows and Linux
Are you tired? Scared? Anguished? Do you feel weak? Sad? Pathetic? Do you wish you could stand up for yourself? Against the one that hurt you?
Are you filled with pent up rage?
Do you want to brutally murder someone and get off while doing it???
Well this is the place for you!
Content Warnings 18+
transphobia, use of transphobic and homophobic slurs, sadism, descriptions of gore and violence, and suggestive themes.Includes:
- A interactive fiction game that can be played in the browser or via executable;
- A pdf version of the game's story;
- And an "Afterthought" pdf/zine discussing some of my thoughts and some stuff about the game.
Official playlist:
This was developed for the TRANS FXCKING RAGE JAM.
Purchase
In order to download this angst you must purchase it at or above the minimum price of $4 USD. You will get access to the following files:
Community Copies
Support this angst at or above a special price point to receive something exclusive.
Community Copy
For my financially unlucky, queer, and/or trans people.
Don't be afraid to claim one. All I ask for is feedback, whether that be via comment or rating is up to you. With each purchase above the minimum price, 2 copies will be added here.
If there are none left, but you're trans and can't afford it then you can hit me up on my Tumblr.
Development log
- Executables now available!Jun 02, 2022
Comments
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somehow some of the quotes lined up exactly with things ive been told or heard, word for word, from people in my personal life, and i feel like that made the experience better, in a way? this game makes you feel seen. thank you, i really needed the edginess lolz :) - community copy user
This was really good and powerful. Scary, but also like a hug. I would like to revisit this game again someday, when I need it. This game is supportive and empowering, at least that's how I see it.
This is now my favorite game, thank you so much for this experience, I'm gonna go hold my plushy.
i really liked the supporitve messaging and stuff, im not out to very many people yet so as of now i don't really have a person to put onto the kinda vessel i guess?
anyways it's a nice little thing :3
thank you so much for the community copies. im turkish and cannot pay in dollar. i will come back after finishing this!
back here. as someone not out ive never experienced transphobia *firsthand* but this was still a great experience. thank you so much for creating this!
Howdy, had to take up a community copy cuz i am a poor. Good game though, to get your rage out. Also i think it made me realise that i might be a demigirl
Hi, trans enby fellow who also has ocd here. I wish I had found this game earlier, I was stuck in a really really really toxic shcool enviornment, despite being practically raised as a people pleaser (something that did not mix well with being trans to say the least) There were multiple times my few friends had to convince me not to ressort to physical violence and i was just so fucking tired of feeling unsafe, and even some of the people i trusted and who helped me come out turned out to be assholes....I was just so angry and tired and angry and tired and angry and tired and my dysphoria got worse and i sressed about grades and turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms and i wanted to never have been born and for all the fucking assholes to never have been born...I had known those fuckers since we were toddlers but i still wish them to just...please shut the fuck up for once. SORRY FOR THE RANT! BTW D: Just wanna say this experience was complicated for me but nice in a way... for once not worry about not lashing out, and having to take it day after dayafterdayafterdayafterdayafterdayafterdayafterdayafterday....I wasnt even the one who got the worst of it.....i hopemy friend is doing good now... i just wanted to say that getting those feelings off my chest in this way felt nice in a way. Thank you -Sam
Hello! I'm from a country where the dollar is pretty expensive, so I claimed a community copy to check it out. I have a hard time focusing due to my ADHD so I'll probably take some time to give feedback, but it sounds really cathartic and I can't wait to experience the story. I wanted to give thanks in advance for the opportunity of playing this since I normally can't buy games on itch.io due to the previously mentioned issue :3
Found this game and immediately knew I needed to play it.
This game was EXHILARATING. I've never felt like I could outburst, I've always had to hide my anger in fear, sorrow, any negative emotion in fear of how others would perceive it. This felt Freeing to be able to get it out like this.
It helped me take rage out on an old "friend" who harassed, stalked, and abused me long ago without ever needing to see her again, and I haven't been able to express or feel my anger for years and this did it.
I loved so much about this game, the art, the music, the story direction- all of it, and I look forward to whatever you make in the future. Thank you for making this impactful game.
the way this game transports you to a place where you're allowed to feel every ugly, compartmentalized emotion you may have and release it and to just feel without all the "buts" and "what ifs" is so, so satisfying. an incredible job well done on this piece and I'm glad I had the opportunity to play it.
Couldn't find her in there, but I appreciate this anyway.
I am in literal awe. This game made me tear up. This was so very beautifully written. I loved the color palette, the music, and especially the writing. The art of Powers was beautiful too. I believe I am going to replay it again to absorb everything that happened. Thank you for creating this literal masterpiece!
I just completed this game, and am unsure on how I feel, I chose my mother as the person that I get to murder viciously. She reacted poorly to me coming out, and I experienced a ton of “hidden” transphobia. I almost feel like I’m not allowed to be angry and there are parts of me that don’t wish her dead. But this still made me really happy.
I often feel the same when it comes to anger: either I'm not allowed to feel or that I shouldn't feel it at all. I was hoping to push the truth that you're allowed to feel enraged by how others have treated you and wanted to create a safe environment to do so.
I'm really glad you enjoyed the experience and that it made you happy ♡
I'm sitting here not even a full minute after completing this, and this might be my new favorite game/experience ever - genuinely. The playlist you made for this really swept me up and I'm honestly still tearing up a bit even after finishing this hurricane wonderland of an experience.
Thank you, from the disabled trans person in the corner who's thought long and hard on maiming abusers/bigots, who never thought I'd get to vicariously live the revenge fantasy of my dreams <3 I hope you have a great day/night too, that your pillow is always comfortably cool, and that your pens never run out of ink
You're very sweet ♡ I'm happy I was able to help you live through your revenge fantasy. I hope you have a lovely month.
That was intense and overwhelming and comforting(?) I'm not at all sure how I feel now except that I'm glad this exists, and I look forward to spending time with/as Powers again sometime when I'm having a tough day. I ended up just putting on 'Dance of the Knights' on a loop while I played, which was perfect.
'Dance of the Knights' is pretty good atmospheric one to loop for this. I'm glad I was able to cause you such emotions. ♡
What an absolutely wonderful, therapeutic experience. Anyone who is trans/genderqueer, or even has the slightest question about their gender, I recommend playing through this game, at the least to let off some steam. To the devs, thank you so much for the free access to those of us trans who are struggling
♡
Thank you so much for the free access for poor queers n trans <3 this was an extremely cathartic experience, and I think it really tapped into a very specific traumatized/angry/violent/horny rage that so many of us feel. This touched on feelings I don't talk about, and I appreciated the sweet, personalized narration, and I absolutely loved the art style. Definitely had a crush on Powers from their description ;) haha. Thank you!!
I'm happy you enjoyed it. Though I was bullied into charging for it, I still wanted my financially unlucky peers to be able to experience it. I'm glad it was able to tap into something specific for you; I wanted this to cause a unique experience that I haven't come across often. ♡
Really wish I could just beat up god, 10/10 otherwise
It would be amazing to beat up god. I'm glad you enjoyed it <3
This was needed, much needed
Well, I couldn't think of anyone who was a bigger roadblock in my transition other than myself, so I went with beating up "my ex". Close enough, I guess.
this was confusingly therapeutic 10/10
this oddly helped me let go of a lot of built up resentment from my childhood. therapy, really. the music with it <33 made the cake <33 i have always been a very timid and withdrawn person, even as a child, and letting go of what should have been let go a long time ago was something i needed desperately. i will be sending this game to my friends in hopes that they can also enjoy the rage
You're too kind ♡ It makes me happy to know it helped you in some way. I hope you continue to find ways to help you let that tension out of your body.
This is really awesome, love the writing here. Made me a bit uncomfy in a good way if i'm honest. Also really loved that there was a bigender option, kind of used to being invisible and just picking nonbinary in stuff like this
I'm glad you liked it! And yeah, I tried to add as many options I could think of because I've realized how underrepresented a lot of labels are in games. Honestly, I consider it lucky if there even is a nonbinary option to begin with.
Yesssss, I've been looking for games like this!
The concepts of life and death have fascinated me since I was much younger and I've always gotten off on the power high of the mere idea of holding someone's life in my hands and being in complete control. That combined with getting bad at those fucking people who've made my life hell? I don't think there's words to describe how that feels.
I've always felt a pang of regret mixed in with the enjoyment after I'm done though, and that's always bothered me. I don't want to regret hurting these people, yet I do... Oh well, not like I can about being better than them or some other high road bs. Even if I do feel some remorse, that doesn't take away from the other things I feel.
Anyways, sorry for my ramblings! I really enjoyed this game and have recommended it to some friends who are of the same mind as me. Do you have any recommendations on other games like this or anything? Because I've found so very little through my long time searching. I am curious as to what you'll make next in any case. Have a good day!
I wish I had recommendations, but I personally haven't come across games dealing with what mine does. I wish you luck on your search though.
And thank you for your kind words. I'm glad you enjoyed it. You have a nice day as well!
wow
i don't know how to put it into words, but this game... gets it. i'm usually wary of games that explore such harsh themes, especially overt transphobia and slurs, yet this game did it in a way that is both sensitive and honest.
i still don't know how to feel about what i just experienced, but i do know that now i have a different lens from which to view violence and harm against us - not through pain and sadness alone, but through anger and strength as well.
thank you<3
There's no need to thank me. Thank you for your feedback and for playing. ♡
i've spent like half an hour trying to put into words how this made me feel and i've gotten no closer so i'm just gonna say it has me at a loss for words
would absolutely recommend it to people though like
11/10
or well itch.io uses a star rating system so 6/5 would probably be more accurate but
I'm glad you enjoyed it <3
One of the best things about organizing the Queer Games Bundle is getting to see the huge variety of artists under this umbrella.
I see a lot of games, your game is one of the ones that leaves me in awe. I look forward to seeing what you create in the future.
Thank you! You're too kind ♡